Raisa's Journey I: Urschnitzel

I was born in an Abramite shtetl in the outskirts of the Austerreich. A small village by the name Hühnerberg, roughly six leagues north of Vindobana. Born a quarter-dwarf (on my mother’s side) I was raised to only cook and clean for the men of the village. While I loathed the cleaning, I grew to love cooking. Not that I cared much for what the boys said of my cooking (nor did I care much for boys anyways). It was my Bubbe Breindel who taught me everything I knew during my time in Hühnerberg. It was during one Sabbat in late Summer when Bubbe Breindel told me to leave Hühnerberg for Vindobana, there I could truly hone my culinary craft. Under the cover of night, I stole away from Hühnerberg, atop my donkey Eyzl, with only my cooking journal, a set of knives, and a couple ducats. 

Vindobana was breath-taking, a bustling urban metropolis in contrast to the rural hovels of Hühnerberg. Steamwagons cruised through the packed streets as smoke billowed from the rooftops. Barkers and merchants shouted above the roar of factories hoping to attract a couple ducats from passerby’s. At Vindobana’s heart was the Kaiser-Kochschule, a culinary university of the highest degree where lowly cooks are trained to be high-chefs or magirists. The few students who show enough aptitude are taught in the ways of gastromancy or culinary magic. Gastromancy as an art infuses magic into the cooking process creating unusual meals and eliciting magical effects upon tasting said dish. 

I was allowed to prepare a single dish for my entrance exam, to be tasted by legendary headmaster of the university. While other cooks prepared elaborate Gaulish entrées and Latin desserts, I opted for something more homely. Urschnitzel is often sneered at by the culinary elite, seen as a dish for drunken farmers not the nobility. Ur or Aurochs were massive horned bulls that could produce enough milk to feed a whole family but due to the amount of grazing land they required, they could only be raised in rural Austerreich. I could only imagine how I looked, a quarter-dwarf frantically pummeling strips of Auroch Steak with an oversized mallet as the grains fell from the inspector’s hour-glass. I only just managed to garnish the Urschnitzel with a handful of Petersilie when the bell rang. 

Applicants fell like flies as the Headmaster rejected dish after dish. I began to sweat as I feared maybe I had simplified my dish too much, why would the instructor of high-chefs choose to eat a simple peasant dish? With a swift flourish of his silver fork and knife, the Headmaster sliced off a coin sized piece of the Urschnitzel. It felt like the entire world froze as I waited in dread for the Headmaster to slowly chew and swallow the morsel. He said nothing but gave me a curt smile and moved along to the next candidate. When the Deputy Headmaster stepped up to the Podium, I sighed and began to pack up my tools expecting the worst. But by some miracle, he called my name, Raisa of Hühnerberg, as among the newly accepted students at the university. It was only after the ceremony did the Deputy Headmaster stop me to say that the Headmaster had grown up a poor boy in the mining town of Iuvavum, the dish having reminded him of his humble origins and childhood. The recipe for Urschnitzel is as follows:

Depiction of an Adult Male Auroch or Ur

Ingredients:

    • 4 Auroch Steaks (roughly 200 grams each)

    • 50 Grams of Flour

    • 7 Grams of Paprika

    • 5 Grams of Salt

    • 3 Grams of Pepper

    • 2 Eggs

    • 250 Grams of Grated Bread

    • 140 Grams of Auroch Lard

    • 2 Grams of Petersilie

    • 2 Lemons

Instructions:

Pound the steaks with an iron mallet to an even 10 millimeter thickness. Add the flour, paprika, salt and pepper together into a bowl. Add the grated bread and beaten eggs in two other bowls. In a large cast-iron scutella pan heat the auroch lard until melted and crackling. Dredge each steak in the flour mixture first, then the beaten eggs and finally the grated bread completely coating the steak. Then gingerly place each steak into the scutella pan. Fry each steak for 3 to 4 minutes on each side until a deep golden bread. Serve with lemon slices and garnish with petersilie. 

Raisa of Hühnerberg, the Author of the Liber Gustum, Magirist, and Gastronomancer Extraordinaire

Next: Raisa and the Pasta Pot

Raisa's Journey IV: Pain Renaître

It was the Year 1837 of Our Lord in the outer realms of the Lordship of Bourgogne. I had left Mediolanum roughly a Moon prior seeking apprenticeship under the Magister’s Guild of Gaul. The Kingship of Gaul is a land of great adversity, the wealthy nobility dined upon the most lavish of dishes and exotic plates while their serfs tilled the lands with barely a rusk or porridge to feed themselves. 

While serfdom had been eliminated throughout much of western Efenland, the crown of Gaul had managed to hold onto this archaic practice through the Sorciers de la Cour. Magical bastards, the lot of them, the Sorciers are an order of sycophantic mages who pledged loyalty to anyone with enough ducats to their name and delighted in tormenting the Gaulish peasantry. 

As my donkey, Eyzl, was fatigued after days of travel along the River Rhône, I made haste towards the village of Riverain roughly ten leagues south of Lugdunum. Spotting the glow of fires and chimney smokes emerging from the cozy cottages of the local peasantry, I tethered Eyzl to a nearby hitch. Inside I met a married couple of villeins, Ysabeau and Onfroi and their young daughter whose name I could not remember. Ysabeau and Onfroi were indebted to the Manor of Lord Barnabé, a local nobleman (and a glutton at that). In exchange for a couple cuprum, the couple provided me with a bed of a straw to sleep, water for Eyzl and food and drink. They presented me with a grainy bread not dissimilar to Horsebread, they called this bread Pain Renaître or Reborn Bread in Anglish. 

Ysabeau explained to be that Pain Renaître was a specialty of the local Gaulish serfs. It was created using the scraps and crumbs of bread, flour and seeds often sweeping the flours to scavenge what little they could during times of hardship. As such the bread was reborn from discarded scraps. In exchange for a couple more cuprum she offered to provide me the recipe for inclusion in the Liber Gustum. Since the composition of Pain Renaître differed based on what was available, this recipe will simply provide a standard example for the bread. The recipe is as follows:

Ingredients:

    • 50 Grams of Barley Flour

    • 50 Grams of Wheat Flour

    • 50 Grams of Millet Flour

    • 50 Grams of Rye Flour

    • 250 Grams of Breadcrumbs

    • 200 Grams of Dried Peas

    • 200 Grams of Brewer’s Barm

    • 350 Milliliters of Water

Instructions:

Grind your Breadcrumbs and 100 grams of your Dried Peas into a fine powder with a mortar and pestle. Mix together your Barley, Wheat, Millet, and Rye flours. Add the powdered Breadcrumbs and Dried Peas to the flours and slowly add in the Brewer’s Barm and Water. Mix until a thick dough is formed then leave covered for 4 hours. Roughly chop the remaining 100 grams of Dried Peas and knead them into the dough. Form the dough into a ball then wrap in a cloth and place in a covered basket for one day and one night. Score your loaf with a knife and place in a hot oven and bake for half an hour. If one desires a longer shelf life, let the loaf cool for a night then bake once again for half an hour. 

Author’s Notes: 

This grainy bread is a personal favorite of mine, whilst the nobility preferred the milled white flours, I much prefer the earthy flavor and texture of peasant breads. Ysabeau provided me with two loaves for the road and I savored them greatly, using them to sop up a stew I prepared and later toasting and slathering with lard and honey. I should consider some way to rebrand this simple dish to the gourmands at the Guild. 

Raisa of Hühnerberg, the Author of the Liber Gustum, Magirist, and Gastronomancer Extraordinaire 

Previous: Raisa and the Serpent of Mediolanum

Next: Raisa and the Cuisinier of Parys

Curried Cinnamon Bird: Dālcīnīcīl Karee

The Dālcīnīcīl, better known as the Cynnamolgus or Cinnamon Bird, is a pheasant sized bird of prey native to the Eastern Lands of Mahadvipa. The Dālcīnīcīl builds its nests atop the tallest of trees using bark and branches stripped from cinnamon trees. In stripping the trees of their bark, the Dālcīnīcīl consumes a large amount of raw cinnamon throughout its life. However, hunting the Dālcīnīcīl is no easy task requiring a great amount of cleverness to take down the elusive birds. Arabian hunters opted to lure the Dālcīnīcīl with chunks of meat then net it whereas the native Mahadvipans opted to use lead tipped arrows to send the bird’s nest crashing to the ground. The bird’s nest can be ground up and used for its cinnamon content and the bird itself can be cooked for the nobility where it is praised for its natural spicy quality. Dālcīnīcīl Karee or Curried Cynnamolgus is unique among Mahadvipan dishes for using less spices than most Curries as the Dālcīnīcīl possesses its own unique spice. 

Depiction of the Dālcīnīcīl or Cynnamolgus

Hunting of the Dālcīnīcīl or Cynnamolgus

Ingredients:

    • 1200 Grams of Dālcīnīcīl Meat (legs and breasts)

    • 2 Mangos

    • 2 Onions

    • 60 Grams of Ghee

    • 75 Grams of Sugar

    • 30 Grams of Gingifer

    • 25 Grams of Garam Masala

    • 6 Lemons (juiced)

    • 2 Cardamom Pods

    • 2 Cloves of Garlic

    • 500 Milliliters of Coconut Milk

Instructions:

To prepare Dālcīnīcīl Karee first peel your mangos and dice then mince your garlic, gingifer, and onions. Add 30 grams of ghee and sugar to a pan and heat until the ghee is melted, and the sugar is starting to brown. Then add the lemon juice and coconut milk. Let simmer for 5 minutes then set aside. Melt the remaining 30 grams of hhee to a pan and add diced mangos, garlic, gingifer, onions, cardamom, garam masala and the Dālcīnīcīl meat. Let cook for five minutes then flip the pieces over and cook for another five minutes. Place over a bed of rice and then spoon over the sauce over and serve. 

Werewolf Tea: Morgentau

Background: Morgentau or “Morning Dew” is a beloved drink among the Werewolves of Teutonia. Created to ease the pain of Vollmondkrankheit or “Full Moon Sickness” that follows a Werewolf after their violent transformation every full moon. Werewolves found themselves sickened, exhausted, and nauseated after their night of animalism and the Morgentau served to settle the stomach, ease the bones, and calm the mind. It is often drunk alongside a heaping plate of Vollmond Morgenessen.

Ingredients:

    • 500 Milliliters of Water

    • 5 Grams of Fennel

    • 5 Grams of Mayweed

    • 5 Grams of Rosemary

    • 3 Grams of Salt

    • 15 Milliliters of Honey 

Instructions:

Grind your Fennel, Mayweed, and Rosemary with a mortar and pestle then bring your water to a boil. Once boiling remove the kettle from the heat and add the ground up herbs, salt, and honey. Let steep for 10 minutes then strain and serve. 

The Imperial Cake: Torta Infernale

In the world of How To Cook Your Dragon there is one dessert to rule them all. Crafted by the Archmagirist and high-chef of the Empress of Latium, Dario d'Ambrosio, this dessert is a testament to the great poet Dante of Florentia. D'Ambrosio imagined this dish as his Magnum Opus, to fully articulate his prowess as a cook. The Torta Infernale, is a decadent nine-layer caked with each layer corresponding to one of the Nine Layers of Hell in Dante's Divina Commedia. The cake is tiered with each layer getting smaller and thinner is it moves towards the top. The dish is reserved for those of noble blood and is only served at royal weddings, coronations, and banquets. It is said that people are inherently drawn towards slices from the tiers that represent their sins. 

Depiction of the Inferno

Layer One - Limbo: The bottom layer is a traditional Hellenic Honey Cake with Pomegranate seed, the favorite of many ancient pagans.

Layer Two - Lust: The second layer is a decadent Cheese Cake with slices of Apple, Figs, and Dates resembling the fruit of temptation and seduction.

Layer Three - Gluttony: The third layer is possibly the richest layer of the cake, being a decadent dark chocolate fudge cake, molten chocolate endlessly oozing when a slice is cut.

Layer Four - Greed: The fourth layer represents the treasures of the earth by incorporating walnuts, peanuts, and macadamia nuts with ginger root.

Layer Five - Wrath: The fifth layer represents the heat of anger as a cinnamon spice cake with ground chilis, cloves, and other spices.

Layer Six - Heresy: The sixth layer represents the burning tombs of the Heretics as a rum cake with fire-scorched meringue.

Layer Seven - Violence: The seventh layer represents the blood of the violent by a layer of red velvet cake with cherry cream.

Layer Eight - Fraud: The eighth layer is not a cake but a cream pie.

Layer Nine - Treachery: The ninth layer represents the icy nature of treachery as an ice cream cake.

Werewolf Breakfast: Vollmond Morgenessen

Background: The Vollmond Morgenessen or “Fullmoon Breakfast” was created by the Werewolf Tribes of Southern Teutonia. Historically Werewolves would transform whenever they wished and lived off the land, hunting on men and beast alike. However, this led to conflict with the Holy Order of St. Jaeger’s during the Great Tierkriege where thousands of humans and werewolves alike were slaughtered. This in turn led to the signing of the Wolfspakt where the humans and werewolves agreed to peace as long as the werewolves eliminated those of their kin who could not control their shifting. 

However, even the eldest of the werewolves could not control themselves under the light of the full moon. During this time each month, werewolves would uncontrollably transform into their most bestial states and lose all semblance of sanity necessitating being locked up for the night. This process is extremely exhausting leaving the werewolves sickened for days afterwards with Vollmondkrankheit or “Full Moon Sickness”. The Vollmond Morgenessen was created to combat this sickness by replacing all of the nutrients lost during the Full Moon and stopping the nausea, lethargy, and migraines.

Depiction of a Werewolf attack

Blutwurst Ingredients:

    • 400 Grams of Blutwurst/Black Sausage (preferably from a Pig)

    • 15 Grams of Lard (preferably from a Pig)

Baked Apple Ingredients:

    • 1 Apple

    • 10 Grams of Butter

    • 20 Grams of Oats

Bone Broth Ingredients:

    • 500 Milliliters of Bone Broth (preferably from a Pig)

    • 1 Large Onion

    • 3 Carrots

Other Ingredients:

    • 500 Grams of Salted Swinecheese

    • 5 Pickled Gherkins 

    • 1 Liter of Beer

Instructions:

Chop your Blutwurst into rounds then cook with the lard in a pan over an open fire. Let cook for 5 minutes then plate. 

Chop your Salted Swinecheese into slices and plate them. Slice your Gherkins lengthwise or into rounds and plate them.

Core your apple then stuff it with butter and oats. Place in an oven for one half-hour. Once soft remove from the oven and plate. 

Finely mince the onions, then peel and chop the carrots and add to the Bone Broth. Heat the Bone Broth over a fire for 30 minutes occasionally stirring. Once cooked remove and set aside. 

Pour yourself a mug of beer and imbibe with the Blutwurst, Gherkins, Salted Swinecheese, Baked Apple, and Bowl of Bone Broth. A cup of Morgentau is also a popular addition to the Vollmond Morgenessen.

Sweet Street Food: Gordian Knots

Background: Gordian Knots are a favorite street food that emerged from the Kingdom of Anatolia. Anatolia is a melting pot of Hellenics, Urartians, Hittites, Hurrians, Parthians, Abramites and various ethnic groups. It is said that Gordian Knots are inspired by the God-King Lysander who conquered the city of Gordian by slicing the Impossible Knot of Gordian in twain. They come in many varieties and flavors but are always some form of knotted dough strands coated in some flavoring. The most common varieties are Canella, Pistachio, and Date with others preferring Honey, Pomegranate, or even Saffron and exotic fruits. Gordian Knots are often enjoyed during the New Year's Celebration as their knotted nature is often used to represent the cyclical nature of the year.

Gordian Knots: Top Left - Pistachio, Top Right - Dates, Bottom - Canella Clove

Ingredients:

    • 120 Grams of Butter

    • 225 Milliliters of Milk

    • 15 Grams of Brewer’s Yeast or Ale Barm

    • 30 Milliliters of Honey

    • 5 Grams of Salt

    • 1 Egg

    • 375 Grams of Flour 

    • 250 Grams of Sugar 

    • 8 Grams of Powder Canella 

    • 3 Grams of Powdered Cloves

    • 150 Grams of Pistachios 

    • 175 Grams of Dates

    • Rose Water (optional) 

    • Date Syrup (optional)

    • Pomegranate Syrup (optional)

Instructions:

Melt 60 Grams of butter in a pot. Once melted stir in the milk. Let sit for 3 minutes. In a separate bowl mix the brewer’s yeast and the honey. Pour the milk and butter into the bowl and combine. Stir in the salt and egg and whisk to combine. Slowly add in the flour while kneading to fully mix. Once the flour is fully added knead for 10 minutes. Divide the dough into twelve slices and roll out each slice into 20 centimeter rope. Tie each rope into a knot. Melt the remaining 60 grams of butter and set aside. Then using a gyro-mincer or a mortar and pestle, grind the pistachios and dates separately. Mix together the powdered Canella and Cloves into a separate bowl. Coat each knot into the melted butter then roll in either the ground pistachios, ground dates, or canella and cloves mixture and place on a baker’s pan. Let rest for 10 minutes then place in the oven and let bake for 15 to 20 minutes. Remove and serve with rose water, date syrup, honey, or pomegranate syrup.